Puerto Rico - Land of speed bumps, potholes, and tolls

I've returned from my second adventure in Puerto Rico and all in all it was a good time. After having been exposed to the island, I've been able to make some observations about Puerto Rico

Driving: I think Puerto Ricans are some of the worst drivers in the world. I can't really imagine what their driver's manual consists of if one even exists at all. If I'd guess, it would say something like this:

"The lane in which you are traveling shall not be dictated by speed of travel nor by the fact that you are passing another driver. Lane of travel shall be dictated solely by the number of potholes in the other lane.

"Speed of travel shall in no way be affected by lane position. It is perfectly acceptable to drive any speed desired at any given position on the road. For example, you should not be concerned that you are driving at 33 mph on an expressway in the left hand lane."

"At all times during and after dusk, all police-related vehicles shall drive with their lights flashing. This is to serve two purposes: 1) To confuse non-natives into thinking that they are being pulled over and 2) To make it easy for all drivers to locate parked police vehicles trying to pull over said drivers*."

"At no time shall blinkers be used."

"Puerto Rico shall place toll booths approximately every two miles on highways."

* Editors note: One would think that having police parked with lights flashing would make it so easy for drivers to locate that they would adjust their driving so as to not get pulled over. This is clearly not the case.

Puerto Rico must have recently discovered speed bumps and thought that they were the greatest technical innovation EVER. Thinking this, they decided to place an obscene amount of speed bumps all over the island, every two feet.

Throughout the week, I got a lot of experience driving around the island and became like a local. My friend Issac said to me: "Damn, you drive just like a Puerto Rican." My response: "Sí soy un Puertorriqueño."